pain in the petunia

I’m sitting here typying on Honey Jr’s laptop that likes to take a nap after every ten minutes (total without warning shutdown) while I hope and pray with my fingers and toes crossed that today will be the day that my new Mac charger will arrive in the post so I can return to my regularily scheduled life because life without your Mac when you live in the middle of back a** nowhere is no sort of life at all.

So since I can’t really post (because I can already hear this half dead laptop making the pre-shutdown whirring noises), I bring you this old post, from exactly two years ago, when I wasn’t with a broken Mac charger, waiting on a new one, and had sometime for Some Serious Thoughts…
(originally posted 2nd November 2009)

I’m seriously thinking about decoupage. I like to think about doing things but I rarely do them. I’m more of a planner than a doer. Ok, so I did move to France and I am writing this blog, but decoupage? Could I be a decoupager? It is French. And Marie Antoinette dabbled in a little decoupage. Maybe if she had kept her nose in the decoupage, she could have kept her head. Just a thought.

I’m also seriously thinking about getting involved in local politics. Like being the Mayor of Le Petit Village. Can I do that? Would my EUness be enough or would I have to be fully French?

Must google later and find out.

I seriously think they need me. The current Mayor is a Communist representing the local Communist Party. Not that there is anything wrong with Communism. If that’s your bag then go right ahead, it’s a free village (isn’t it???). But all I’m saying is that although it’s a beautiful thought, it never really works out that way and all your left with is a tyrannical dictator, drab clothing, and a bowl of gruel.

And get this… the other political party in Le Petit Village is Fascism! I’m not making this stuff up! We’ve got the Communist Party and the Fascist Party! Who decides to be a Fascist in 2009? It’s like someone just woke up angry one morning, “Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a Fascist… AND THEN EVERYONE WILL SUFFER!!! May I have my juice box now?”

In a village of 260 people, I think they need another option other than Mussolini or Marx. They need a softer, cuddlier option. That will be my campaign slogan… Vote for Sara Louise, the soft and cuddly candidate. I would guarantee carmel apples, fondue parties, story time, and outlaw drab clothing. We would have merry-go-rounds, and hayrides and eat chocolate brownies for breakfast. And all the shutters will be painted pink, because I said so. I promise that there will be benevolence in my dictatorship.

Hugs for everybody!

So to sum up; I’m seriously thinking about decoupage and I’m seriously thinking about becoming a dictator…
 oops, I mean getting involved in local politics.


10 responses to “pain in the petunia”

  1. Decoupage is a piece of cake 🙂 you can totally do it. Lots of luck with your communist mayor- sounds like quite an interesting village. 🙂 lots of characters?


  2. I love decoupage. Politics, on the other hand, sounds frustrating. But pink shutters? You'd totally win!


  3. Too freakin' hilarious. Definitely worth a re-post.Errm, communism and fascism as the only political options? Wow. I don't even know what other comparatives exist that could adequately compete with that.


  4. SO FUNNY! I sure hope you are still a free village. And I hope you eventually run for mayor…maybe you can incorporate the Texas Rangers into the Village, and appoint Papa the head Ranger.


  5. I really enjoyed the political dynamic descriptions of le petite-reminds me of how ari and I duel it out for control of my abode.I was vaguely annoyed by the apple reference… Can't let me leave work for a moment can you 😉


  6. Hard to believe your two options are communism and fascism. I definitely think you need to offer yourself as a third option. I have always pictured Le Petit Village as free wheeling and tolerant. Generally those two parties are not so much.


  7. You should so go for it Sara. Mayor Sara has a nice ring to it and if you mandate having a Starbucks in your village, I will move there and vote for you (maybe even dummy up some votes too!) Giant, real, American coffees deserve giant votes 🙂


  8. Here's hoping you get your charger back soon! 🙂 & your serious thoughts make me smile.


  9. Bahaha you make me laugh so much! Thanks for making my Friday a little bit brighter 🙂


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