Santa my darling… don’t you think this Patek Philippe watch would look pretty swanky on my dainty wrist…
Hmmm…. let’s see… what time is it?
Oh, it’s time to fly all of my family and friends from the US, Ireland, England, Scotland, France, and Australia to get together for one wonderful week long shindig and we would have it here…
Look at that… it’s the Hampton’s mansion from Revenge.
Do you like it? I do.
I should probably look nice for the big soirée so how about this hair…
While you’re at it, feel free to give me Jessica Biel’s body too. And since I’ll look banging, wrap me up in a Hervé Léger dress for the festivities. B A N G I N G.
Everything OK so far?
And Santa, since I’m sure we probably would wreck the place anyway, (my Irish family can throw it down), you might as well just hand me the deed and let me keep the house. I’d also like the closets filled with Stella McCartney’s latest collection. I’ll need some swanky clothes to swan around the manse in.
Since I’m going to be Stateside for at least a couple of months a year Santa, living it up in my new home, I’ll need a new car too… this Maserati would do fine…
Now obviously this is not going to fit under the tree, so go ahead and leave it wrapped in a big red bow in front of my new house. And since you’ll have the red ribbon out, wrap the mansion in a big red bow too.
That should about do it… until next year anyway.
But seriously Santa, if you don’t happen to win the euromillions, I’d be very happy if you can just spread a little peace and happiness around, maybe sort out this whole pesky eurozone crisis thing, and a Starbucks in Le Petit Village, wouldn’t go amiss (I did ask for this before… I’m still waiting. Just saying).